I started using dickdoo as a name about six weeks ago and have been waiting for someone to ask me what that meant,well SteelTip did and I will share it with you all........ this is not meant to offend the ladies that may read it and the guys will all get a kick out of it I believe and even Pastor Paul will chuckle.
When I was in the everyday work force ,by the nature of my work I had at least a free luch with a vendor every week. This one day we went to an all you can eat steak and shrimp and I just pigged out cause I love those shrimp.When I got back to work I was late and the secretaries were back and hard at it. I was approaching my office near the secretarial area when I grabbed my stomach bent over in pain and fell up against the wall, one of the girls jumped up and came to my aid asking what was wrong.I told her I had a bad case of dickdoo because I had eaten to many shrimp, she asked dickdoo? whats that? well I said I ate so many shrimp that my belly sticks out further than my dickdoo.....
Good one, but that must have been in the days before sexual harassment suits. That kind of thing today would get you into trouble on the job.
When I was still at the fertilizer plant, my nickname was Shadow because was pretty thin. The Lord blessed with a talent for writing, which I often practiced on my styrofoam coffee cup. One day the personnel manager came by and told me that the Shadow had retired. It took me a few minutes to get his message through my thick skull. The big guys in the front office didn't appreciate a few of my poems.
I'll let you figure out the missing word on the first one:
Please fix the acid plant sh*****
For months now that things been a quitter.
But don't take my word;
Just try and flush a turd.
You'll realize why I'm so bitter.
Hey, what can I say! 24 hours after I wrote that on a work order the john was finally repaired.
But here are the two that really got me in trouble after a major fertilizer spill that harmed some wildlife:
At Hawkeye we sell fertilizer in quantities very large.
The next time we ship it down river, let's not forget the barge.
Then there is:
I have such bad luck fishing, I cannot keep my cool.
I should just do like Hawkeye and kill them by the school.
Maybe that's why the company is no longer in business.
But I do a few serious things, one of which may get me a trip to Hawaii in December to present a poster to GW.
i have an embarassing nicknae! Not sure how i spell it, at school i spell it dew but technically i should spell it doo, when i was little my grandparents used to babysit me while my parents worked and my grandfather would always bust my chops and call me doobutt, because every tine her turned around there was doo doo on my butt. of course when he first called me it, it was something he and the family chuckled about cuz i was too young to understand, but he just kept calling me that and it stuck to this day, i never thought to make that my login name on here though
In 1991 I wrote an article (I'm told it is called a soliloquy) about the American Flag. "Permanent Duty Station" is the description of a military funeral through the eyes of our flag. I had it printed into 11" x 17"posters with a flag at the top and an eagle shadowed behind the text. The printer I took it to broke up when he read it. Then I learned that he had lost a son in a military training accident. It meant a great deal to him to print it. Each poster is signed and hand numbered. There is a limited printing of 10,000, but I haven't even sold 300 in the ten years since its printing.
My congressman at the time was trying to send us to Pearl Harbor so I could present the first copy of the poster to President Bush during the 50th anniversary observance of the Pearl Harbor attack. He was battling cancer and the plans got lost along the way. I ended up having to box up the framed poster and mail it to President Bush just two weeks before he left office.
This year our congresswoman (widow of the late congressman) is trying to fly us out to Pearl so I can present a copy of the poster to the junior President Bush for the 60th anniversary. I also plan to present a copy to the Pearl Harbor Memorial. What will make the trip more memorable is that my better half and I will celebrate our 30th wedding anniversary just four days after the Pearl Harbor anniversary. I could never hope to afford a trip like this, so you can guess what I am praying for.
The poster is hanging in a few military installations around the nation, including a non-com's school out near the Air Force Academy in Colorado. I scanned in one of the photos they sent me and it should show up at the bottom of this message.
A few years ago, we came home from a pastors' picnic to find a phone message from Jimmy Dean of country music and sausage fame. He called "Permanent Duty Station" "delightful" and "extremely well written." He said that if he had gotten the poster six weeks earlier, he would have recorded it. Now, that's a compliment!!
I have a website from which I sell the posters: http://www.rollanet.org/~chalosi/permdutysta.html I have a brief portion of the poster there, but intentionally don't print the full text of it. Otherwise, some people would just copy the words and make up their own poster. I'm selling few enough as it is. As I sell them, the money goes to buy computer software I need, or woodworking tools and supplies.
Well, there it is in a nut shell. OK, a very large nut shell!
The Lord willing, we will hear something in a few weeks. I'll let all of you know if it comes about. Then you can see my ugly mug on the national news on December 7th.
Well, Pastor, add one more to the almost 300 count... You'll be hearing from me soon. One of my wifes brothers was amoung the few to loose their lives during the Gulf War...
Jeff, don't feel bad, my aunt is over 40, and the oldtimers in our family still call her Wallnut.... She used to throw her doo/doo and it stuck to the wall :-) Oh, don't tell anybody, it's a family secret...:-)